Ladies, we need to be careful about whom we choose to marry or date. Over and over I see countless women who end up with guys who never took responsibility of their role.
In the book of Ruth, we see a woman (Ruth) with nobel character, along with Boaz (also a man with nobel character), the man whom she later marries.
Upon losing her husband, Ruth thought Boaz would be her kinsman-redeemer (i.e. in that time if a woman lost her husband, the next relative had to claim her in order to keep the family name going, and the property). Boaz tells Ruth that he isn't next in line (there is another man before him), and that he will go to see if this guy wants to be the one to claim Ruth.
It turns out, "bachelor-number-1"* turned out to be an impostor...in other words, he didn't want to be...the one.
*Since the guy has no name in the story, we'll call him "bachelor-number-1"
Chapter 4 begins with the word 'meanwhile' (i.e. whilst Ruth was waiting to find out what happens about the man for her), Boaz goes up to the town gate to sit. When "bachelor-number-1" comes along, Boaz calls him over to sit. He also calls 10 elders of the town to sit with them. With witnesses (evidence or proof), he tells "bachelor-number-1" the situation.
Lesson 1: The person who comes to marry you should be an HONEST man.
Boaz was a very honest man. He put aside his own feelings and desires in order to make sure that the process of marrying Ruth was done the right way. If he was a man who did what he wanted and when he wanted without regard to the "law" or those around him, he would've married her (or eloped) as soon as she said she was interested in him.
Lesson 2: The person who comes to marry you will do this the RIGHT way. He will not hide and sneak away, he will want it known and shown proudly & rightly in fear of God and not others. He'd also want it in the open, with people watching because he knows that there is nothing to hide and he's not trying to trick you or play you.
Lesson 3: The person who comes to marry you will take FULL RESPONSIBILITY of you & his role.
Boaz tells "Bachelor-number-1" that Naomi (Ruth's mother-in-law) is now selling the land of her late son. In verse 4, "Bachelor-number-1", says: "I will redeem it."
Boaz then continues: "...and that land comes with Ruth, and you can redeem both because you're the only one who has the legal right to do so."
As soon as "Bachelor-number-1" hears that the land comes with Ruth, he then says: "then I cannot redeem it." In other words, he backs out.
"Bachelor-number-1" only wanted the land. He says that getting Ruth would mean he would endanger (jeopardize, threaten, risk or compromise) his own estate (domain, fortune, worth).
Anything sound familiar ladies? Some of you realize that "line" or those "excuses", but that's okay, today that chain will be broken in the Name of Jesus. Amen. :)
If someone is destined for you, they'll take full responsibility of you as a person, and not just your "stuff" (take this which ever way you want - keep it real with yourself!).
I once heard that the way you can tell between a boy and a man is when one is faced with taking responsibility, and it's true, a man will stick around when a "heavier load" enters the picture. A man won't run at the first sign of responsibility, and it's a red flag if that "responsibility" is you!! lol (Ladies, a man should see it as a joy to have you, not a chore or a burden. Yes, times can be tough, but that shouldn't be the reason he runs away, there has to be a legitimate reason to move on).
So "Bachelor-number-1" seals the deal (i.e. tells Boaz that he can have Ruth) by giving Boaz his sandal (that's how they used to "seal the deal" back in the day!).
Boaz announces this news to the 10 elders, and says, “today you are witnesses!” and the elders and all at the gate say: “we are witnesses,” and they bless him.
Even though "Bachelor-number-1" had the legal right, he couldn’t take responsibility for it. Just because someone has the “right” to do something, doesn’t mean he is the right fit for you. I've heard people say: "it says not to be unequally yolked, so this guy is the one because he is definitely a Christian!" And I say, "great, that's the 1st step, what about the rest, what about his character, would he deny you when hard times hit?" We have to think clearly when it comes to the rest.
Let the man who claims you & redeems you be able to take FULL responsibility, and be able to proclaim it to the entire world. Let him be fully proud & content about it. Amen!
We will see some imposters coming through, who will try to claim you, but will not have the right qualities and characteristics to uphold his smooth words & façade. Psalm 55:22 says: "His words are as smooth as butter, but in his heart is war. His words are as soothing as lotion, but underneath are daggers!"
Heed warning. It doesn't matter if he carries a Bible, is the leader of the groups, is in a high position, the son of a pastor, or is loved by all the ladies. The test of time will test his character as more things are added to his load. In time, he will then be able to attest to whether he will be selfless enough to claim a jewel like you. A real man will not run when he sees responsibility. He will take to it, just like Christ did for us at the cross. Amen.
Whilst waiting, and expecting your future man to be...a man, we also have to prepare ourselves to have nobel character and to be patient enough to wait for God's best for us (but this is another blog post!). I truly encourage you to do a study on the Book of Ruth, and to ask the Lord to speak to you through it! Amen!
Once again, keep the faith, and love like you've never loved before.
With love always,
FAITH by Promises
Is a girl who fell deeply in love with Jesus,