So...I don't know how to start this blog. I was talking to God yesterday and I'm like: "Lord, I don't know how to start this blog...I have NO IDEA how to start..." and....I guess He said I should start the way I just started: to tell you the truth, that I really don't know how to start.
So here we go. I've confessed how I feel, now I'll enter into what I now feel this post should be about.
Until God stopped me.
"You're moving too fast my dear..." He said.
I didn't know what to do. I got so excited about this new project that He gave me insight about a while ago. He gave me the name, the ideas, and said this was going to be a part of my future, but each time I tried to implement it, the doors would close and I would run back to God.
"Listen" He said.
"That's what I'm trying to do..." I said back. But it wasn't panning out. My words back to God were not coinciding with my actions. They were so contradictory. They were so different and I didn't want it any other way. How could it be that I was telling God that I would wait, listen to Him, and wait for instructions, when really I would go ahead and start things on my own and think that it it's all a part of God's plan?
Even if it was a part of God's plan, doing the right thing at the wrong time is still wrong.
It hurt, but yesterday I finally listened. It had been a while.
To think that the familiar story of Jonah was happening to me, I was in a position where I was finally in a place of "surrender". For me it then turned into a place of brokenness, and understanding that God is Sovereign and He is good and He really is looking out for me and He wants me to prosper in the RIGHT way and not just my way.
I realized that even if I did all these GREAT things and got so successful, it would mean nothing if God wasn't in it, if God never told me to do it, if God said "my dear, that wasn't meant for you...".
My heart would break.
I imagined myself, facing Him, being in front of Him, trying to even avoid any type of contact, looking down in shame, knowing that I didn't listen, I didn't do it the way it was supposed to be done.
And now I want it done the right way. The way God is supposed to do it. The way in which I stand back and let my Maker, my Creator, My love, My True love, take over, take control and not to fuss and fight with Him.
Maybe it's pride, maybe is selfishness, maybe it's not wanting to let go, but either way, I know that it belongs to my flesh, and it needs to go.
I want to do what God wants me to do, but I do what I do not want to do.
It's time to let go, and let God. I pray you'll see it with this blog. I came here with nothing to say, and now...
Only God knows what I will be able to write to you, and to myself. I pray that in some way, this blog can help us, it can show us just how GOOD God is, how much GRACE He has for us, and just how LOYAL He is.
He loves you dear friend, and He will love you until eternity.
Until next time, keep the faith, and love like you've never loved before. Time is too short to let life take over for you; let God take over and it will be worthwhile.
With love always,
-FAITH By Promises.